The most important piece of getting along is being able to be heard and understood. Many conflicts arise because others are unaware that their behavior is annoying or hurtful. We like to use the "I message" when our feelings are anything other than happy. It is very important that people are specific in what bothered them. It goes like this:
"I feel (sad, mad, scared, hurt) when someone (calls me a name, cuts in line, hits) me. I need to feel (safe, happy, liked). Will you please (use my real name, go to the end of the line, keep your hands to yourself).?
The next step is the 3-part apology to be given by the offending person. It is extremely important to declare you know what you did. It goes as follows:
"I know I (called you a name, cut in line, hit you). I am sorry. Will you forgive me?"